I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
This girl is more easily done than said...
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
Randomize
