dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
Randomize