we made out on top of his cat.
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Randomize
