Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
don't take this the wrong way, but I'm not drunk but I need you to take me to the ER and you're the most likely to not be drunk now.
Randomize
