he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
Randomize
