Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
Randomize