R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
i out mim tonsoeep
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