Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
