i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
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