ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
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