i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
Some dudes just stopped and stared at me peeing in the street for like 5mins, and I yelled HEY. HEY. WANT ME TO SHIT IN YOUR MOUTH? I'LL SHIT ON YOUR CHEST FOR FIVE DOLLARS, PAPI
this is why i love drunk you
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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