i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
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