There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize
