Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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