never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
false alarm. still invincible.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize
