Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
Randomize