Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
Randomize
