I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
My ass is underappreciated
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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