Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
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