I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
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