This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
Randomize