i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
Randomize
