in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
this beer tastes like vomit already
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
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