I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize
