i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Randomize
