I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
