i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
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