Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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