So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
We need to feng shui this bitch.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
