The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
It's rum buckets o'clock
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
Randomize
