"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
It's just like the Real World with babies
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Randomize
