also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
Randomize
