He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
Randomize
