Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
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