I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦ðŸ¼â€â™€ï¸
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
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