I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
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