Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize
