But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize
