Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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