you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
