we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
