no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
Princesses don't give blow jobs
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
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