i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
Randomize
