I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
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