No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize
