it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
