I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
Randomize
