I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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