Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
Randomize
