I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
He called his prostate his "boner button".
I will be naked everywhere
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
Randomize