But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
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